Asking men out is a bad idea and I explain why in my post why you should never ask a man out
Now the question some might ask “is should you really never ever ask a man out?”
Actually not never but almost always.
So when should you ask men out and how should you ask?
First the when. When are you allowed to ask a man out without coming across as being desperate or easy?
Here’s the answer. When you have had enough time to think about it and are convinced that the risk is worth the effort.
Asking a man out could back fire and it usually does. It could backfire immediately or in the long run.
Another time when you can ask a man out is when you’ve given him time to make the first move but he seems to be taking forever to summon the courage to ask you out.
Now be sure that you see sufficient evidence indicating he fancies you too or you may be shooting yourself in the foot if you make the move.
Now to the how.
How should you ask a man out? Asking men out works best when you use the indirect approach. You don’t just walk up to him and ask him on a date, you get him to ask you out on a date. Its some sort of reverse psychology approach.
So how exactly do you do get him to do this? How do you ask a man out and make him feel like he’s doing the asking?
Here’s how you ask a man out.
Never take the direct approach. Always do it the indirect way. I think its called flirting.
Like some guy once said, “its better to attract a lady than it is to chase one.” Same applies when it comes to attracting men.
Attracting a man is so much more effective and productive than chasing one.
Attracting a men raises your market value while chasing one reduces it.
Which would you rather be? A high priced product or a cheap one? Just what I was thinking.
So how do you attract a man you fancy and get him to think he is asking you out when its your who is actually asking him out?
Here are a few pointers.
Ask questions
Asking a question is always a good way to break the ice and start a conversation with a man you like.
It doesn’t have to be about something you want to know. Most likely you already know the answer to the question before you ask.
Its just a way to get your foot in the door. Your goal is to get him started talking to you. Its a way of making the first move without making the first move; get it?
Once you start the conversation it becomes easy for him to take the initiative and ask you out for a real date.
You could ask him for the time or what color of boxers you can get for a dear friend. Make sure you don’t say ‘boyfriend’; we want him to know you are single.
You could also ask him what perfume he is wearing or what store he got his nice shoes from.
Just ask a question and give him a chance to start a conversation with you.
Trust me its better to ask a question than it is to ask a man out.
If for some reason however he fails to do so, let it go. He probably isn’t into you. Time to move on.
Pick your clothes carefully
Wear clothes that flatter your figure and and emphasize your strong spots. Don’t wear stuff because everyone is wearing it.
Wear only what looks super good on you especially when you have plans to accidentally bump into him at the store, at the pharmacy, in church or on your way to work.
Make it hard for him to miss spotting you and realizing how astonishingly ravishing you look.
Give him the feeling that if he doesn’t walk up to you that instant and say ‘hi’, he’ll regret it for the rest of his life.
Flirt lightly
Yes i said it, flirt. Remember the story of Ruth in the Bible? She flirted with Boaz with Holy intentions and landed herself a husband.
Use your eyes, your smile, your walk, and your talk. Use what you have to make him take notice of you but do so sparingly.
Too much of everything is really bad for your love life; trust me.
Be sweet
I came across a book sometime ago at a bookshop. It’s titled “Being good to your husband on purpose” and its written by a woman.
It got me thinking. Do some women actually make it their life’s mission to be mean to their husbands on purpose? Seems so.
To attract the man of your dreams to you, you have to treat him right. Be nice to him on purpose. Be sweet, be sexy and be a lady.
Let him feel super special in your presence. Be nice to him in your interactions with him and chances are he will take notice of you and ask you out.
I am assuming in this case that he is someone you already have contact with. Someone you work closely with or you bump into regularly.
Be nice to him and he’ll be encouraged to ask you out. Just make sure you don’t overdo it.
Be nice to your friends
I always like to gauge a person by how they treat others around them; not how they treat me.
This is especially true if the person you are assessing is someone who wants to get some kind of favor from you or is interested in impressing you.
In such scenarios, they will probably fake it, act like they are really nice people, and kiss your ass.
Some men assess a lady from afar and observe the way they treat those around them; especially those who are subordinate to them.
This gives the men a better picture of who you really are. If you treat the doorman nicely you would most likely treat him like a king if he dated or married you.
Be nice to your friends and to those around you. It could very well attract the love of your life into your space and prompt him to ask you out.
Always smell good
The only thing more important than a woman’s scent and a woman’s smile when it comes to attracting men into her life is her words; her personality.
Smelling good when you walk past him at the bus station or on the stairs will get your noticed and very likely get him attracted to you.
It will give him something to think and talk about and could serve as the conversation starter that sets the ball rolling.
Make friends with his friends
Sometimes you can get him to make the first move by making friends with his friends.
Making friends with his friends brings you into his circle and makes it easier for him to ask you out.
Just be careful to ensure the friend or group of friends you choose to connect with are not in the pervert category.
Shop where he shops
When you are interested in getting a guy to ask you out its super convenient for you to simply and casually show up at the places where he hangs out.
You could sign up at the gym where he trains or shop at the grocery store where he shops.
The idea is to make it as convenient as possible for him to bump into you and increase the odds of him asking you out.
If he fancies you too, he will take the hint and ask you out. If he doesn’t ask you out, let it go. It’s his loss.
Invite him to church
There is nothing wrong with saving a soul and finding love all at the same time.
I think its a cool combination. Sadly, things don’t always work out that way so don’t get your hopes up too high using this approach.
Nevertheless, its certainly a nice way to break the ice and create an avenue to connect with a man you would like to ask you out.
Set High Standards
Set high standards for yourself. Don’t act like you are desperate, easy or cheap. Treat yourself well without taking things to the plane of sheer arrogance.
Men are attracted to women who hold themselves up to high standards. Hold your head up high, treat yourself well and chances are you will get that handsome hunk you fancy to ask you out without you having to make the first move.
Remember, it is better to attract a man than it is to chase a man. Unless you are sure its absolutely the best way to go, don’t ask a man out; let him ask you out.
